Thursday, May 27, 2010
My heart is heavy for my little one!! He just got over another sickness that took him out for about a week! The only symptom was a fever over the weekend and then the next week he slept. He was so tired all week. I was really worried about him.
This is going to be the norm for him when he gets sick. It takes all the energy for his little body has to fight the sickness off. To see my little one like this... words can not describe! The worst part about it is...we have very little communication between each other. I sign to him all the time and he is slowly learning signs. It's been a total nightmare trying to get him speech therapy. I kept signing "I LOVE YOU". I hope that he understand the depth of love I have for him!!!
Someday there will be a time when HE can tell me "I LOVE YOU" if it's with words or if it is through sign I will take it anyway I can. I want to know him!!!! I want to know what goes on in that little sweet head of his! I desperately want to help him when he is frustrated and can't get across what he wants. To have just a conversation with him would be a dream come true!
My heart is heavy for my little one! So I ask the Lord for strength for Patience, for understanding as I teach my little boy language in some form. (What we most of the time take for granted.) I pray for sensitivity when he throws his tantrum and for the wisdom to know how to deal with them when they arise!
I know in my heart how deep the love goes and where it's gonna take us both! For it is not only my love but God's love, and how much more love can that be!!!!
My dear little Alex, you are amazing!! Your smile and giggle light up my day! I see how much you want and desire, just in your eyes and I so want to get you to where you need to be! May I be your example of Gods love pouring down on you. To be the cheerleader you need me to be.
To be your mom is such a privilege that I never take lightly! Thank you so much for being a little Alex!!!! I LOVE YOU SO VERY VERY MUCH!!!!!!!!
Saturday, May 8, 2010
Tomorrow is Mothers Day! I have been thinking a lot about it tonight! I love being a mother! When I was young that is one thing I wanted to be when I grew up! For me becoming a Mother is the hardest thing! There is so much to that title!
As a Mom, I pray that my kids know that I love them. Yes, I tell them over and over again but I really want them to know in their minds and in their hearts! As for me I need to discover how each one of them accepts my love! I could tell them till I'm blue in the face that I love them but with out action behind it, they are just words. Are they words that my children can trust and believe in!
As I continue to think about this, I know that people care and love me by the time they spend with me. Someone can tell me that they love me over and over again but it isn't really real until they take that time.
I am a big gift giver! I love giving gifts! It's how I show that I care about my friends, family, and children. The joy I get for making people smile and to have something tangible for them to be reminded that they are loved by me is priceless!
My husband wants to hear that I love him! No matter how much I clean up the house or cards I give him. He accepts my love through my words that are spoken.
I have no idea how Eli, Alex, or Emma accepts my love and I have years to come on finding that out. I believe it is so important to find that out! As a mother that is very important to me!!! Because when I am teaching them how to grow through life lessons they need to know that it comes from a loving spirit!
With the title of being a "Mother" come big responsibilities! I mean BIG! It also comes with So much JOY and LAUGHTER. On the flip side, it comes with heart ache and worry, and every other emotion imaginable. Smile
I trust in God that he made me the way I need to be to take on this great big responsibility of being a Mother. Every step of the way, he is right there guiding me. Teaching me how to take care of his children!
I am blessed to be a Mother! To me it is the best job in the whole world!!
Thank you to my family, OH how much I love each and everyone of you!!!